Monday, March 14, 2011

Not the UnChristian but the ExChristian

I was pointed in the direction of an article on-line at Christianity Today that deals with the issue of the those who are leaving the Church AND the faith -- the so-called "Young Doubters."  It is a fair and reasoned article that offers none of the simplistic answers so common today (put in a praise band, make church like the mall, etc.).

Others have probably read and commented on this in depth article but I was caught by the turn of a phrase.  The problem today isn't those who are unchristian, but that so many are ex-Christian. Strictly speaking, they are not an "unreached people group." They are our brothers, sisters, sons and daughters, and friends. They have dwelt among us. And now they are gone...

Some have suggested that we should not panic and that younger folks have always taken a "hiatus" from the Church until young adulthood and responsibility seems to call them back.  Others are not so sure the situation is the same.  Young adulthood is not what it used to be, marriage is delayed longer or not even sought out, and many of these are not having children -- children being sort of God's wake up call to young adults.  Still others suggest that the variety of choices or non-Christian options has snagged some (especially, apparently Wiccan).  Some point to a hardening of those who have left -- something not particularly isolated to religion and faith but that covers much of their life and thinking.  In the end, those "leavers" are not leaving for one reason but for many reasons and therefore there is not one answer to draw them back. 

Now, no one is saying Christianity is on the verge of extinction.  But there is a certain seriousness about the number of those leaving and the reasons why.  In the end, it seems that there might be more of a common thread to this than first expected.  The author's own conclusion is that "I realized that most leavers had been exposed to a superficial form of Christianity that effectively inoculated them against authentic faith."  A "seeker" style Christianity with its low commitment, high emphasis on spectator/entertainment worship, small groups, and its acceptance of the "me" at the center of things has kept many of these from knowing true Christianity.  In addition, the inability of orthodox Christianity to answer their doubts and shepherd them through those doubts has left them cut off from the Church and the faith -- at the very moment they were most in need of the Church and of the nurturing care of the faithful.

I might suggest here that many of those "leavers" went to youth groups and national youth gatherings in which cutting edge Christian music and provocative and anti-traditional Christian speakers tried to show that you don't have to belong to your grandfather's church in order to be Christian.  I might suggest that but I won't dwell on the well documented failings of our youth programs.  Maybe I will let the author speak for himself (and he sounds pretty Lutheran here):  There's nothing wrong with pizza and video games, nor with seeker-sensitive services, nor with low-commitment small groups that introduce people to the Christian faith. But these cannot replace serious programs of discipleship and catechism. 

The sad truth underlying all of this is that these "dechurched" young people are much harder to reclaim than "unchurched" and this is true for all age groups.  Unless we are willing to heed some of the warning signs and make sure that it is a Biblical faith that is being proclaimed and taught, a confessional, creedal, and catechetical perspective that is the starting point and guide through life, a liturgical setting in which the focus is on the means of grace and not the person, and a mercy driven - servant shaped life together that directs our baptismal vocation, we will have more and more of these hard nuts to crack and more and more articles lamenting the loss of those who were once one of us.

5 comments:

Sue said...

I really worry that you are describing my younger son. And I don't know what to do about it, other than pray, of course. He's only 28, has been married and divorced twice. It was rumored that the first wife was wiccan, though she agreed to be married in our church. He's had a number of bad experiences and I think has lost his faith. I try to talk about faith in my own life without applying pressure to turn him off further.

Anonymous said...

During the last 25 years something
has happened in many parishes of the
LCMS: THE PASTOR NO LONGER TEACHES
YOUTH CONFIRMATION CLASS OR EVEN
SUNDAY MORNING ADULT BIBLE CLASS.
Confirmation classes are taught by
the laity as are the adult Bible
classes on Sunday. This is done in
order to ease the burden of an
overworked pastor. The type of policy and mindset is watering down
the Christian education in a parish.

The pastor is the theologian in
residence of the parish. He should
not relinquish his duties of
teaching the Word of God. There is
a big difference between laziness
and being overworked. It is vital
for the pastor to be involved in
the teaching ministry.

Fallhiker said...

My 28 yo son has also "left" the church I had instilled into him at an early age a christian attitude; He loved going to church, to sunday school. As he got older he began to have problems with other "Christian" youths in his youth group. As so many people have issues with people who identify themselves as christians yet fall short of the christian ethic. I tried to instill in him the fact that going to church no more makes you a christian as hanging out in a garage makes you a mechanic. I also explained that christians aren't perfect just forgiven. That we all fall short. Interesting all those who drove him from church are no longer going to church themselves. We need as Parents, Elders, Pastors, and Youth Leaders, maintain disapline in our children and make them accountable for their actions. To ensure they don't drive others out.

Joyful Sparrow said...

I am exactly the kind of ex Christian you've described here (minus the Wiccan part). I'll never be back, not because the church failed me or the people there weren't teaching me as they should, but simply because there is no proof to back the church's or the Bible's claims. And I'm not willing to live my life under a hedge of falsehood just so I can feel better about what comes after this life.

I find the god of the Bible to be unapologetically cruel and hateful, and he's not someone I'm willing to worship, nor give my life to.

Also, I'm not willing to lend my good name to the organization of the church, which has, very repeatedly, throughout history been an encourager of violence and hatred towards those of unlike faiths or lifestyles.

And lastly, I have found far more peace, far less guilt, and a general happiness and satisfaction with life OUTSIDE the walls of religion. And for that, I thank God (whoever or whatever he or she may be).

Anonymous said...

You write: because there is no proof to back the church's or the Bible's claims. And I'm not willing to live my life under a hedge of falsehood just so I can feel better about what comes after this life.

I respond there is more archeological and ontological proof for God and the claims of the Christian Bible than for the existence of Bill Shakespeare or any one of a thousand other "historical" figures but, that said, "proof" does not beget faith, faith sees proof...

You write: I find the god of the Bible to be unapologetically cruel and hateful, and he's not someone I'm willing to worship, nor give my life to.

I respond that cruelty and hatefulness are the general domain of the creature and not the Creator; whether you are willing to worship Him or not is irrelevant to His moral character and wisdom. This God does not ask you to give Him anything but He, in generous and rich mercy, has given you what you neither deserve nor are worthy of.

You write: Also, I'm not willing to lend my good name to the organization of the church, which has, very repeatedly, throughout history been an encourager of violence and hatred towards those of unlike faiths or lifestyles.

I respond that those who claim to act in God's name often blame God for their own violence and hatred and that God has always been the voice of genuine peace and not some artificial cease fire.

You write: And lastly, I have found far more peace, far less guilt, and a general happiness and satisfaction with life OUTSIDE the walls of religion. And for that, I thank God (whoever or whatever he or she may be).

I respond that guilt is the domain of the moral and those who refuse to hear the sound of their God given conscience or His Word will not feel guilt - though that does not mean they are not guilty. Many of the most despicable characters in history were happy -- happiness the likes you seek is often unattainable by those who are exemplary people and giants from among the ranks of human history.