Saturday, November 9, 2019
The Day Will Come. . .
That is one side of the coin. . . my desire to be a pastor and my life as a pastor. The other side of the coin is the ministry itself. The thousand of so babies, children, youth, and adults baptized at my hand, the thousands upon thousands of faithful communed from my hand at the Lord's altar, the hundred and hundreds of youth and adults confirmed in their baptismal faith before me, the tens of thousands of sermons preached for ordinary Sundays, festival days, and in pastoral care to couples being married and loved ones being buried . . . these are the things that I love and love to do. These are the things I still do week after week (better with experience and a varying degree of expertise and accomplishment). And I am not ready to give it up -- even if there are some who think it may be time. I have trouble with the whole idea of retirement.
Some long for the day of retirement and count it down by the year, month, week, day, and hour. Some dream about the day when they will no longer be pastor. Some hope for the day when they will be free to do what they want (as if being a pastor is not it). Some long for the day when they can do nothing. Not me. I am not counting down but rather terrified of the day when the calendar of active service will end (whether due to desire, health, age, infirmity, or family pressure). The truth is I love what I do.
Just a few thoughts after hearing somebody extol the wonder of a life without a clerical collar. I looked across the table at a guy a year older than I am and he whispered what I was thinking. . . not me. Not me. . .