What keeps your pastor up at night. . .

Though you might think it is the ordinary worries of attendance and offerings and finding enough Sunday school teachers that keeps a pastor up at night.  Probably not.  Yes, these are concerns and sometimes weigh heavily on his shoulders.  I have been there watching as Sunday after Sunday weather, illness, and whatever else keeps the attendance low.  I have wondered if the absentees are gone for good or simply on hiatus.  I have been handed a paycheck by a church treasurer and told not to cash it until the next offering or two comes in.  I have sat with treasurers trying to figure out which bills to pay when all cannot be paid.  These are all legitimate concerns.  But that is not what keeps me up at night.

What keeps me up at night is whether or not God's people have the knowledge of their faith and the will to defend that faith against the seemingly constant assaults of the world, the devil, and our own sinful flesh.  What keeps me up at night is if we are doing an adequate job preparing our youth and teaching those new to the faith so that they will grow and not be lost along the way to temptation or distraction.  What keeps me up at night is who will be the pastor to my children and grandchildren as the seminary classes decline in numbers.  What keeps me up at night how to sort our way around the potholes and obstacles laid before us by the pace of change and the kinds of changes we see happening all around us.  I suspect I am not alone.

Let me say it is not because I have no confidence in God.  I know that though the jurisdictions of Lutheranism may disappear, its faith will live on.  I know that the Lord has promised the gates of hell will not prevail.  I know that God has pledged us a living and efficacious Word that always accomplishes His purpose in sending it.  I know all of this and do not doubt it. What I also know is that God will not play as as puppets for His purpose but seeks a people willing to walk in the dangerous way of everlasting life.  What I also know is that God has chosen to work through us and not simply for us or in us and so we are not optional extras to His purpose or plan.  What I also know is that we can just as effectively be impediments to Him and the work of His kingdom as we can be agents of that kingdom and instruments through that kingdom comes.  I do not equate God's kingdom with an earthly kingdom or a piece of real estate and I don't know who does.  So what I pray for is what Luther hit on:

“God’s kingdom comes when our heavenly Father gives His Holy Spirit so that by His grace we believe His holy Word and lead a godly life now on earth and forever in heaven.”

and again: 

"But what is the kingdom of God? Answer: Nothing else than what we learned in the Creed, that God sent His Son Jesus Christ our Lord, into the world to redeem and deliver us from the power of the devil, and to bring us to Himself, and to govern us as a King of righteousness, life and salvation against sin death, and an evil conscience, for which end He has also bestowed His Holy Ghost, who is to bring these things home to us by His holy Word, and to illumine and strengthen us in the faith by His power.

Therefore we pray here in the first place that this may become effective with us, and that His name be so praised through the holy Word of God and a Christian life that both we who have accepted it may abide and daily grow therein, and that it may gain approbation and adherence among other people and proceed with power throughout the world, that many may find entrance into the Kingdom of Grace, be made partakers of redemption, being led thereto by the Holy Ghost, in order that thus we may all together remain forever in the one kingdom now begun.

For the coming of God's Kingdom to us occurs in two ways; first, here in time through the Word and faith; and secondly, in eternity forever through revelation. Now we pray for both these things, that it may come to those who are not yet in it, and, by daily increase, to us who have received the same, and hereafter in eternal life. All this is nothing else than saying: 'Dear Father, we pray, give us first Thy Word, that the Gospel be preached properly throughout the world; and secondly, that it be received in faith, and work and live in us, so that through the Word and the power of the Holy Ghost Thy kingdom may prevail among us, and the kingdom of the devil be put down, that he may have no right or power over us, until at last it shall be utterly destroyed, and sin, death, and hell shall be exterminated, that we may live forever in perfect righteousness and blessedness.'"

What keeps pastors up at night is not the fear that God will let go of us or rescind His promise or deny His Word.  No, indeed.  But we do worry that we will let go of God, no longer trust or expect His promise, or deny the Word either by blasphemy or indifference.  I suspect I am not alone in this.