Friday, June 15, 2012

You are not special. . .

Apparently a commencement speaker near Boston addressed the graduates with something different from the usual "you have the world by the tail, nothing is impossible, today is the first day of the rest of your life" baloney that one usually is force fed on such occasions.  I regret that the link to the full text is not working right now (swamped with traffic, perhaps).  That said, I leave with a few pertinent paragraphs from one graduation speech that will not be forgotten.  Some will call him a rude and arrogant crank while others will laud him as if he were the only honest man left.  The truth is somewhere between those extremes.  Read it and weep or rejoice, it is your choice.  I believe the speaker was named David McCullough.

[C]ommencement is life’s great ceremonial beginning, with its own attendant and highly appropriate symbolism. Fitting, for example, for this auspicious rite of passage, is where we find ourselves this afternoon, the venue. Normally, I avoid clich├ęs like the plague, wouldn’t touch them with a ten-foot pole, but here we are on a literal level playing field. That matters. That says something. And your ceremonial costume… shapeless, uniform, one-size-fits-all. Whether male or female, tall or short, scholar or slacker, spray-tanned prom queen or intergalactic X-Box assassin, each of you is dressed, you’ll notice, exactly the same. And your diploma… but for your name, exactly the same.

All of this is as it should be, because none of you is special.
You are not special. You are not exceptional.

Contrary to what your soccer trophy suggests, your glowing seventh grade report card, despite every assurance of a certain corpulent purple dinosaur, that nice Mister Rogers and your batty Aunt Sylvia, no matter how often your maternal caped crusader has swooped in to save you… you’re nothing special.
Yes, you’ve been pampered, cosseted, doted upon, helmeted, bubble-wrapped. Yes, capable adults with other things to do have held you, kissed you, fed you, wiped your mouth, wiped your bottom, trained you, taught you, tutored you, coached you, listened to you, counseled you, encouraged you, consoled you and encouraged you again. You’ve been nudged, cajoled, wheedled and implored. You’ve been feted and fawned over and called sweetie pie. Yes, you have. And, certainly, we’ve been to your games, your plays, your recitals, your science fairs. Absolutely, smiles ignite when you walk into a room, and hundreds gasp with delight at your every tweet. Why, maybe you’ve even had your picture in the Townsman! [Editor’s upgrade: Or The Swellesley Report!] And now you’ve conquered high school… and, indisputably, here we all have gathered for you, the pride and joy of this fine community, the first to emerge from that magnificent new building…

But do not get the idea you’re anything special. Because you’re not.

The empirical evidence is everywhere, numbers even an English teacher can’t ignore. Newton, Natick, Nee… I am allowed to say Needham, yes? …that has to be two thousand high school graduates right there, give or take, and that’s just the neighborhood Ns. Across the country no fewer than 3.2 million seniors are graduating about now from more than 37,000 high schools. That’s 37,000 valedictorians… 37,000 class presidents… 92,000 harmonizing altos… 340,000 swaggering jocks… 2,185,967 pairs of Uggs. But why limit ourselves to high school? After all, you’re leaving it. So think about this: even if you’re one in a million, on a planet of 6.8 billion that means there are nearly 7,000 people just like you. Imagine standing somewhere over there on Washington Street on Marathon Monday and watching sixty-eight hundred yous go running by. And consider for a moment the bigger picture: your planet, I’ll remind you, is not the center of its solar system, your solar system is not the center of its galaxy, your galaxy is not the center of the universe. In fact, astrophysicists assure us the universe has no center; therefore, you cannot be it. Neither can Donald Trump… which someone should tell him… although that hair is quite a phenomenon.

“But, Dave,” you cry, “Walt Whitman tells me I’m my own version of perfection! Epictetus tells me I have the spark of Zeus!” And I don’t disagree. So that makes 6.8 billion examples of perfection, 6.8 billion sparks of Zeus. You see, if everyone is special, then no one is. If everyone gets a trophy, trophies become meaningless. In our unspoken but not so subtle Darwinian competition with one another–which springs, I think, from our fear of our own insignificance, a subset of our dread of mortality — we have of late, we Americans, to our detriment, come to love accolades more than genuine achievement. We have come to see them as the point — and we’re happy to compromise standards, or ignore reality, if we suspect that’s the quickest way, or only way, to have something to put on the mantelpiece, something to pose with, crow about, something with which to leverage ourselves into a better spot on the social totem pole. No longer is it how you play the game, no longer is it even whether you win or lose, or learn or grow, or enjoy yourself doing it… Now it’s “So what does this get me?” As a consequence, we cheapen worthy endeavors, and building a Guatemalan medical clinic becomes more about the application to Bowdoin than the well-being of Guatemalans. It’s an epidemic — and in its way, not even dear old Wellesley High is immune… one of the best of the 37,000 nationwide, Wellesley High School… where good is no longer good enough, where a B is the new C, and the midlevel curriculum is called Advanced College Placement. And I hope you caught me when I said “one of the best.” I said “one of the best” so we can feel better about ourselves, so we can bask in a little easy distinction, however vague and unverifiable, and count ourselves among the elite, whoever they might be, and enjoy a perceived leg up on the perceived competition. But the phrase defies logic. By definition there can be only one best. You’re it or you’re not.


Anonymous said...

I read this speech last week (recommended highly by a parishioner) and thought it was, to wax current, awesome! I pray not only that these young people truly listened, but that we all can return to the ideals presented in this address. Thank you for sharing it with your readers, Pastor.

Chris Jones said...

I believe the speaker was named David McCullough

Yes, he was. He is the son of the Pulitzer Prize-winning author and biographer (John Adams, Path Between the Seas, 1776, etc.) of the same name.

Anonymous said...

I am reminded of a situation that was just the opposite. Many years ago, I was involved in planting an LCMS mission. The pastor that the district eventually sent to us talked all the time about how we were special people, doing special things, in this special place, at this special time, for this special work, blah, blah, blah. We began to call him (behind his back) Pastor Special. In a matter of a few months, my family and I left the mission that we had put much effort in to starting; we just could not stand to be so special.

Anonymous said...

I found it on YouTube:

The last half of the speech is brilliant! McCullogh also gives the kind of speech that graduates need to hear, especially when he tells these young people such things as "don't climb the mountain so the world can see you, climb it so you can see the world... go to Paris to be in Paris, not so you can cross it off your list..." and my favorite, "selflessness is the best thing you can do for yourself."

Also interesting to me was that when McCulogh spoke about achievements, he also reminded these graduates that their passion should not be just for the rewards it would bring them as individuals, but also for the benifit of the other 6.8 billion of us on the planet, and the ones who will follow us... sort of remided me of some of the things that Luther wrote about vocation and serving one's neighbor.